A doctor in St John's Newfoundland wanted to get off work and go hunting, so he approached his janitor. "I am goin' huntin' tomorrow Buddy and don't want to close the clinic. I want you to take care of the clinic and take care of all my patients and I'll give you fifty bucks."
"Yes, sir!" answers Buddy
The doctor goes hunting and returns the following day and asks: "So, Buddy, How was your day?"
Buddy told him that he took care of three patients. "The first one had a Headache so I gave him TYLENOL."
"Bravo Buddy! The second one?" asks the doctor.
"The second one had a bad stomach and I gave him MAALOX, sir." says Buddy
"Bravo, bravo! You're good at this and what about the third one?" asks the Doctor
"Well Sir, I was sitting here having a smoke and suddenly the door flies opens and a woman enters. Like a flame, she undresses herself, taking off everything including her bra and her panties and lies down on the table and shouts: HELP ME - I haven't seen a man in over two years
"Lard Tunderin' Yeezus, Buddy!!! What did you do?"
I put drops in her eyes!!