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  #1  
Old 06-27-2006, 06:24 PM
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Default too funny!!!!!!!!!

One evening last week, my girlfriend and I were getting into bed.

Well, the passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says, "I don't feel like it, I just want you to hold me."

I said, "WHAT??!! What was that?!"

So she says the words that every boyfriend on the planet dreads to hear...

"You're just not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman enough for me to satisfy your physical needs as a man."

She responded to my puzzled look by saying, "Can't you just love me for who I am and not what I do for you in the bedroom?"

Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night, I went to sleep.

The very next day I opted to take the day off of work to spend time with her. We went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at a big, big unnamed department store. I walked around with her while she tried on several different very expensive outfits. She couldn't decide which one to take, so I told her we'd just buy them all. She wanted new shoes to compliment her new clothes, so I said, "Lets get a pair for each outfit."

We went on to the jewelry department where she picked out a pair of diamond earrings. Let me tell you... she was so excited. She must have thought I was one wave short of a shipwreck. I started to think she was testing me because she asked for a tennis bracelet when she doesn't even know how to play tennis.

I think I threw her for a loop when I said, "That's fine, honey." She was almost nearing sexual satisfaction from all of the excitement. Smiling with excited anticipation, she finally said, "I think this is all
dear, let's go to the cashier."

I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, "No honey, I don't feel like it."

Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a baffled, "WHAT?"

I then said, "Honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a while. You're just not in touch with my financial needs as a man enough for me to satisfy your shopping needs as a woman."

And just when she had this look like she was going to kill me, I added, "Why can't you just love me for who I am and not for the things I buy you?"

Apparently I'm not having sex tonight either....but at least that ***** knows I'm smarter than her.
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Old 06-27-2006, 06:28 PM
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Old 06-27-2006, 06:55 PM
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lol sounds like they are perfect for each other!
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Old 06-27-2006, 07:13 PM
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Wow.......fianlly a semi smart man......the woman still has the upper hand though
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Old 06-28-2006, 03:50 AM
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Default funny story

Did not see that one coming. very good. I have passed it on. thanks for the laugh.

me
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Old 06-28-2006, 05:16 AM
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LOL!!! That was good!
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Old 06-28-2006, 02:51 PM
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I've heard that and it still cracks me up!
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Old 06-28-2006, 06:16 PM
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I have never heard that and I love it ... did not see it coming, but I'm blonde so I'm exempt. Great post, Kelly!
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Old 06-28-2006, 07:13 PM
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Laughed my _ _ _ off!!!
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Old 06-28-2006, 08:12 PM
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That was great Kelly - I have a couple friend who could really relate to that!
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