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  #1  
Old 02-11-2006, 02:49 PM
Erin46 Erin46 is offline
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Talking This Made Me Laugh For A Long Time

Once there lived a woman who had a maddening passion for baked beans. She loved them but unfortunately, they had always had a very embarrassing and somewhat lively reaction to her.

Then one day she met a man and fell in love. When it became apparent that
they would marry she thought to herself, "He is such a sweet and gentle
man, he would never go for this carrying on."

She made the supreme sacrifice and gave up beans. Some months later her car broke down on the way home from work.
Since she lived in the country she called her husband and told him that she
would be late because she had to walk home. On her way, she passed a small diner and the odor of the baked beans was more than she could stand.
Since she still had miles to walk, she figured that she would walk off any
ill effects by the time she reached home. So, she stopped at the diner and before she knew it, she had consumed three large orders of baked beans.
All the way home she putt-putted, and upon arriving home she felt
reasonably sure she could control it.

Her husband seemed excited to see her and exclaimed delightedly, "Darling,
I have a surprise for dinner tonight."
He then blindfolded her and led her to her chair at the table. She seated
herself and just as he was about to remove the blindfold from his wife, the
telephone rang. He made her promise not to touch the blindfold until he returned. He then went to answer the telephone.

The baked beans she had consumed were still affecting her and the pressure
was becoming almost unbearable, so while her husband was out of the room
she seized the opportunity, shifted her weight to one leg and let it go.
It was not only loud, but it smelled like a fertilizer truck running over a
skunk in front of pulpwood mill.
She took her napkin and fanned the air around her vigorously.
Then, she shifted to the other cheek and ripped three more, which reminded
her of cooked cabbage.
Keeping her ears tuned to the conversation in the other room, she went on
like this for another ten minutes.
When the telephone farewells signaled the end of her freedom, she fanned
the air a few more times with her napkin, placed it on her lap and folded her
hands upon it, smiling contentedly to herself.
She was the picture of innocence when her husband returned, apologizing for
taking so long, he asked her if she peeked, and she assured him that she
had not.

At this point, he removed the blindfold, and she was surprised!!!
There were twelve dinner guests seated around the table to wish her a
"Happy
Birthday"!!!
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  #2  
Old 02-11-2006, 03:30 PM
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Karen Karen is offline
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OMG
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Old 02-11-2006, 03:43 PM
hblueeyes hblueeyes is offline
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Too funny. It reminded me of a commercial from a few years ago where there was a couple in the back seat as she ripped on while her boyfriend walked around to get in the car.

Me
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Old 02-11-2006, 04:11 PM
tinkerbell5676 tinkerbell5676 is offline
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Default This Made Me Laugh For a long time

I would just sink under the table.
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Old 02-13-2006, 07:58 PM
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Christine Christine is offline
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This was so funny I passed it on to my mom and hubby.
could you imagine if this happened to you?
I grew up with beans for dinner every Sat . I know the "side effects" of them.
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Old 06-04-2006, 02:35 PM
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Old 06-04-2006, 04:40 PM
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Good Lord, how did the people at the table keep from losing it!!!
That was HILARIOUS!

Mary, love your take on that one My older brother told me that when he was in the army they used to use hair spray and light farts when they were goofing off in the barracks....they even tried to take pictures. One night the drill seargent caught them and they had to run like 5 miles....think that stopped their little fart fest!
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Old 06-04-2006, 04:47 PM
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So funny thanks for the laugh, we also had hot dogs. beans & brown bread every Saturday.
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Old 06-04-2006, 07:09 PM
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I don't know which is funnier. The joke or Mary's picture take on it!!

ROFLMAO several times.
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Old 06-04-2006, 07:18 PM
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LMAO~~~ don't you feel embarassed for her? that's a classic..
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