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  #1  
Old 10-31-2006, 06:05 AM
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pepper60 pepper60 is offline
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Funicon What A Mistake!!

Dear Husband:

I'm writing you this letter to tell you that I'm leaving you for good.
I've been a good woman to you for seven years and I have nothing to
show for it. These last two weeks have been hell. Your boss called to
tell me that you had quit your job today and that was the last straw.
Last week, you came home and didn't notice that I had gotten my hair
and nails done, cooked your favorite meal and even wore a brand new
negligee. You came home and ate in two minutes, and went straight to
sleep after watching the game. You don't tell me you love me anymore,
you don't touch me or anything. Either you're cheating or you don't
love me anymore, whatever the case is, I'm gone.

P.S. If you're trying to find me, don't. Your BROTHER and I are
moving away to West Virginia together! Have a great life!
Your Ex-wife

Dear Ex-wife:

Nothing has made my day more than receiving your letter. It's true that
you and I have been married for seven years, although a good woman is a
far cry from what you've been. I watch sports so much to try to drown
out your constant nagging. Too bad that doesn't work. I did notice when
you cut off all of your hair last week, the first thing that came to mind
was "You look just like a man!" My mother raised me to not say anything
if you can't say anything nice. When you cooked my favorite meal, you must
have gotten me confused with MY BROTHER, because I stopped eating pork
seven years ago. I went to sleep on you when you had on that new negligee
because the price tag was still on it. I prayed that it was a coincidence
that my brother had just borrowed fifty dollars from me that morning and
your negligee was $49.99. After all of this, I still loved you and felt
that we could work it out. So when I discovered that I had hit the lotto
for ten million dollars, I quit my job and bought us two tickets to
Jamaica. But when I got home you were gone. Everything happens for a
reason I guess. I hope you have the filling life you always wanted. My
lawyer said with your letter that you wrote, you won't get a dime from me.
So take care.

P.S. I don't know if I ever told you this but Carl, my brother was born
Carla. I hope that's not a problem.


Signed,
Rich As Hell and Free!
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Last edited by pepper60 : 10-31-2006 at 06:14 AM. Reason: Correct Title
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  #2  
Old 10-31-2006, 06:13 AM
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Thumbs up

There are two sides to every story...at least!

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Old 10-31-2006, 09:13 AM
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oh, i love it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
she deserved that!!!!! next time maybe she'll stay faithful......lol
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Old 10-31-2006, 09:14 AM
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ive heard that and it still cracks me up!!!

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  #5  
Old 02-24-2007, 02:56 PM
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Old 02-24-2007, 03:13 PM
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LOL!! Thanks for sharing!!!!
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Old 02-24-2007, 06:24 PM
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Christine Christine is offline
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TAUGHT ME NOT TO DIVORCE MY EX AND NOT TO PUT ANYTHING IN WRITING!!!!!
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Old 02-24-2007, 06:29 PM
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A good laugh.............
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