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  #1  
Old 07-25-2008, 10:59 AM
Kelly's Avatar
Kelly Kelly is offline
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Location: Massachusetts
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Default Ever wondered what happens when Hallmark writers are having a bad day........

>
> My tire was thumping.
> I thought it was flat
>
> When I looked at the tire...
>
> I noticed your cat.
>
> Sorry!
>
>
>
> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~
> Heard your wife left you,

> How upset you must be.
>
> But don't fret about it...
>
> She moved in with me.
>
> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~
>
> Looking back over the years
>
> that we've been together,
>
> I can't help but wonder...
>
> 'What the hell was I thinking?'
>
>
>
>
> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~
>
> Congratulations on your wedding day!
>
> Too bad no one likes your husband.
>
>
>
>
> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~
>
> How could two people as beautiful as you
>
> Have such an ugly baby?
>
>
>
>
> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~
>
> I've always wanted to have
> someone to hold,
>
> someone to love.
>
> After having met you ..
>
> I've changed my mind.
>


> ----------------------------------------------------------
>
> I must admit, you brought Religion into my life.
>
> I never believed in Hell until I met you.
>
>
>
>
>
>
////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////
> //////////////////////////////////////
>
> As the days go by, I think of how lucky I am...
>
> That you're not here to ruin it for me.
>
>
>
>
> ################################################## ##
>
> Congratulations on your promotion.
> Before you go...
>
> Would you like to take this knife out of my back?
>
> You'll probably need it again.
>
>
>
>
>
************************************************** ******************************
>
> Happy Birthday, Uncle Dad !
>
> (Available only in Tennessee , Kentucky & West Virginia )
>
>
>
>
> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~
>
> Happy birthday! You look great for your age.
>
> Almost Lifelike!
>
>
>
>
> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~
>
> When we were together,
> you always said you'd die for me.
>
> Now that we've broken up,
>
> I think it's time you kept your promise.
>
>
>
>
>
>
////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////
> //////////////////////////////////////
>
> We have been friends for a very long time ..
>
> let's say we stop?
>
>
>
>
> ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ +++
>
> I'm so miserable without you
>
> it's almost like you're here.
>
>
>
>
> ================================================== ===
>
> Congratulations on your new bundle of joy.
>
> Did you ever find out who the father was?
>
>
>
>
> %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%
>
> Your friends and I wanted to do
>
> something special for your birthday.
>
> So we're having you put to sleep.
>
>
>
>
>
)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))) ))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))
> ))))))))))))))))
>
>
> So your daughter's a hooker,
> and it spoiled your day.
>
> Look at the bright side,
>
> it's really good pay
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  #2  
Old 07-31-2008, 01:24 PM
pepper60's Avatar
pepper60 pepper60 is offline
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Join Date: Feb 2006
Location: Virginia
Posts: 58,337
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